We got home from St. George last night and it was a long, long drive home. I wasn't able to finish the marathon. I made it to mile 15 and couldn't go any further. I don't know if it was the carb loading the few days before, filling my body with foods that I have never eaten before in my life (think buttermilk banana pancakes- yuk), the foods I ate the morning of the race (also foods I have never eaten before a run), the stress of the event, or the cup of Endurance Gatorade I drank at mile 3 (it has 3x the sodium as regular Gatorade as has been known to make people sick before) which caused an intense burning in my abdomen and chest starting at mile 4. I stopped at mile 13, on the verge of vomiting, fell in to a nurse's arms as she administered oxygen. Paramedics came within a few minutes and urged me to go to the hospital. I wasn't about to be carted off in an ambulance, though. After about 5 minutes on oxygen, I decided to see if I could just make it the 2 more miles to the next nurses station. I barely made it to mile 15. I had nausea, burning in my stomach, abs, chest, lungs, and throat. I sat down on the side of the road and just cried. I knew I wasn't going to be able to finish the marathon. It was one of the most humbling experiences of my life. I had to ask to be shuttled to the finish- the ultimate ride of shame and I cried the whole way down, the rest of the day and even now as I relive the day here on my blog. Anyway, I feel so horrible, so humbled, depressed, anxious, etc. The fact is I'm not a quitter, never have been, and I don't intend on this being the last marathon I [attempt to] run. I've got a few that I'm considering within the next month and a half so stay tuned. As a side note, there were so many nice people who stopped to help me, encouraged me, and made me feel better at the end of the race and I'm so grateful for their support. Congrats to all the people who finished, especially my bro.-in-law, Jim, who trained me and my sisters and gave us advice all along the way. He set a PR of 3:10! Julie, Jessica, and Jenn (my sisters) also all finished with flying colors. Great job!
October 5, 2009
SGM
at 9:46 AM
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18 comments:
Rebecca,
What a huge accomplishment you made. Even though you did not finish the way you wanted to you still finished and you did a great job!!! What a great amazing example you are of living healthy to your family and friends. I am glad to hear that you are feeling better and that you are going to run another.
Way to go!!!!!
I know that you tranined hard for the marathon- what a dissappointment. I think it takes several marathons to know what is best for your body - what to eat, what to drink, even how to train. I know after every marathon I have run, I always learn what worked AND what didn't work for me individually.
You should find another marathon - you will rock it!
Rebecca, you are amazing!! I cannot even believe what you have done already. I know you are probably feeling pretty disappointed, but you really don't need to feel that way because look at all that you accomplished to get to that point! That stinks that something was off that day. I bet if it were just another Saturday you would have been able to do it for sure. Well you are AWESOME, and I can't believe you are going to run another one. You are definitely an inspiration to me!
Oh rebecca that sounds absolutely miserable. I am so sorry that is was so not a fun experience for you, but seriously (and don't think this is a little fake pep talk, b/c its not) I think its a huge accomplishment to have trained that hard and plus to have run 15! miles while feeling horrible! I know this comparison won't be comforting, but seriously I don't think I could run 3 miles continuously, so I think you are amazing.
People who feel sucky about not finishing marathons are people who just got too tired or didn't train hard enough, or weren't mentally tough enough. Getting physically ill in the middle of a marathon and finding it impossible to continue is not 'quitting.' There's no shame at all in that. Getting sick is a very, very good reason to stop- i.e., you'd be dumb and unwise not to. Next time you won't get sick, and you'll finish just fine. Good luck.
That was Ryan.
Oh Rebecca, that brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry that this was so upsetting. I can't even imagine how hard you've worked and even though 15 miles is WAY beyond my wildest dreams I know it isn't what you wanted. I'm truly sorry. I admire you so much and love how open you are.
The other day I found some clues that Anna and Chloe had done for the other kids. The paper I found said, "The jorney is the treasure" I laughed so hard picturing how ticked all the kids must have been when they found out there was no treat. I could send that paper to you if it will help :) I love you and am proud of you.
15 miles is amazing in the first place! I am excited when I make it to 3. Also, there is a limit to what our bodies can do, even though our minds try and tell us otherwise. YOu know your body...don't feel bad. You aren't a quitter. You probably did shock your body with all the crazy foods. You can do it!! We are all behind you!!
lol, Ange. love that quote!
Rebecca, I am so sorry. That is such a pain. I have always thought about how you just hope and pray that you are feeling your best the day of a marathon or any race for that matter, and if you aren't feeling great what do you do? I am amazed you got that far feeling so sick. No one doubts that you could do it in a second. What a bummer though. I feel so bad.
Awwww- Rebecca. Don't EVEN feel bad. I know you feel disappointed, but I hope you are at least aware that you can't direct that disappointment at yourself. It was no fault of yours! And I don't know what these people are talking about that are saying they can barely make it three miles....I don't think I can even run one without wanting to vomit. You are amazingly healthy and fit. I envy you.
Training would be so hard - I know that's so frustrating. But you are a champ for getting so far. Seriously! Your attempt was much more than most could ever do! You can feel good about that. And seriously, we know that you'll finish the next one - and do great! You're no quitter - don't be ashamed. You're one awesome mama to me!
Reba,
Do another one. And don't eat the banana pancake stuff or Gatorade stuff that made you sick in St. George! :) A couple years ago I dropped out of Lotoja after 170 miles of snow, rain, wind & plenty of dark moments--and only 30 miles and 1.5 hrs. from the finish line. I always feel bad that I didn't finish it every year Lotoja comes along. I need to finish it someday to feel better about myself just like you need to enter another marathon to do the same. Good luck on your next one!
Did you throw up on mile 2 of the bike portion of a sprint triathon? Did you then throw up again as you crossed the finish line and everyone was watching? Yeah, your story isn't so bad :) Good job though. I need to step it up and train for a marathon one of these days.
Bummer! I am sorry things didn't go as you wanted, but WOW, I can't believe you did 15 miles (especially considering how sick you were!). Way to go Reba, you are my hero! ;)
so sorry! we all know you'll come back and beat jim's time!
15 is more than I have ever run! Great job. I can't imagine how disappointing that would be. To work that hard and then not be able to get what you worked for...ugh. And i know what a quitter YOU ARE NOT. So I can imagine how much pain you were in. YOu can and will do it next time.
ps- you don't like buttermilk pancakes? are you crazy?
Reba,
As someone who would die of a heart attack walking up to the starting line, I have to say I am incredibly impressed that you made it as far as you did.
I am so impressed that you did all that you did feeling so cruddy!!! You are a trooper and NOBODY that knows you would think for a minute that you gave it anything but your best. Heck, I'm completely impressed that you ran 15 miles!!! You are such a strong lady, I'm sure we haven't heard the last of your marathons...(c;
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